So it all started with a whirlwind romance with service and my God. His soft call consumed me as I burn with a desire to serve Him, He gave me an unquenchable fire that kept my thirst for Him. I remember getting scolded for where ever there is a prayer meeting, I would readily go there, that even my mother could not keep up with my whereabouts in the deep of the night. She told me that I shouldn't over do it, but I long for it, there is this feeling inside me, a kind of high that is only satisfied while I sing for Him.
Now don't get me wrong, serving God has it's ups and downs. The first issue is what we call "professional jealousy," there is this hidden monster that shows its ugly face whenever there's a newbie in the group most especially one with potentials (I'm sure some of us experienced this), maybe because the attention we have been showered for quite a time were suddenly directed to a newbie. Suddenly our comfort zone was threatened by the new member unless she or he would just be a silent minion then they wouldn't be subjected to the angst of the "elders". How would I know? I experience jealousy and have been a subject of jealousy. There might be more deeper meanings to this but why make it complicated. How do we survive? Understanding. We must understand that in a choir we have to deal with different people and different personalities, being the subject of jealousy is somewhat an initial reaction of those who have been running the show and must never be taken personally. If the Choir Master (CM) is giving a special attention to the newbie its maybe because he/she is trying to keep him/her into the choir, especially when the newbie is being treated indifferently, the CM would balance the situation instinctively (or maybe it's a love prospect but that's besides the point ha ha). There are newbies who have lots of ideas that shocks the sleeping enthusiasm of the many, but hey! Isn't it part of the audition to interview a newbie on how will she contribute on improving the choir? ( For one, I was also criticized with things like "who does she think she is?" ) Be glad, some of the ideas will reform your choir besides you don't have to accept everything. It is just a third person's perspective which is the choir master, you and the audiences which is the standpoint of a newcomer for now, before they get incorporated with the "you people." More importantly newcomers don't have to make anybody lesser, it is sometimes us who make ourselves regress because of our own insecurities, we just have to strive and continue to shine and learn to shine with others. And Yes the neophyte will evolve to be the one who will get jealous of another more "promising than thou "neophyte., OK? And to deal with it is to continue on improving yourself and make it a point that they wouldn't be able to do everything without your support and help, try to make yourself indispensable.
Let's deal with another issue on my next post. Hope to hear from you soon!
Let's deal with another issue on my next post. Hope to hear from you soon!
